“Everyone re-incarnates, changes bodies, transitions, you know, and that includes Obama too,” my friend, Rahu Speaks and Reminds Me.

Getting a phone call beamed from my friend Rahu, usually means he’s got some new persona and scheme cooking and so even, I, Iti, Alien Unstoppable, must give pause. He tells me his current incarnation is as leader of the US and the Unarians, the New Age cult famed for awaiting rescuing Alien Love Ships in 2001, and he is about to go to “The Next Level.” (for more on Unarians, see here where they get a visit from an Earthling after 2001, still waiting for their ship to come in…)

Here is Unarian leader Ruth Norman in one of her many revelatory guises.

Ruth Norman, Unarian is full dress

Ruth Norman, Unarian in full dress

Wait a minute!  That looks a lot like a Shepard Fairey?  Could it be? Maybe Rahu is on to something.  Barack Obama…an Alien by association, by portraitist, by his multi-colored face…?

Obama as the half red and half yellow Alien Leader

Obama as the half red and half yellow Alien Leader

Rahu Himself Speaks and Explains:

“So, first I stirred up Obama as The Fake Hawaiian, an Alien Non-American and then lately Hitler,, a Nazi…right?  Well, my next coup is to use my evil energy to simultaneously become both the actual Extra-terrestial version of Obama and the Republicans who try to out him. You’ll note my poetic justice at work as “The Birthers” shall seed the “The Earthers” who are hell-bent on outing Obama for what he and Michelle really are: The New Leaders of Aliens Here On Earth.”

I ask Rahu, who is fond of taking over planets…”Is your evil plan to take over the US as Obama by speaking in tongues through lunatics? And what about Sarah, is Palin an Alien too?”  

(…trust the Alien would not give space on her blog to this bombastic male Alien except for the fact that seeing the Fuhrer’s mustache on the face of Obama made me not only question if the Holocaust really ever happened but also the color of the men under Klu Klux Klan sheets. Krazy.)

The truth is however, when Rahu Speaks and he has a Message of Hope, no matter how dire it seems.

And who is Rahu, himself, really?  Man of Myth, both Buddhist and Hindu, many already see the current Republican party as a manifestation of Rahu.  From Wikipedia:  ”Rahu is a snake and plunges into any area of life he controls into chaos, mystery and cruelty. He is associated with the world of material manifestation and worldly desire; random uncontrolled growth without wisdom or understanding.”  

You can see why Rahu is a completely irritating friend, however, I have to admit that when Rahu Speaks, like a weekend bender, a crying jag, a divorce or ethnic cleansing, people eventually come to their senses.       

I’m glad I voted for Barack/Rahu then.  It seems a circuitous path to Love and Redemption for the Humans, for Rahu to incarnate himself as the Alien Barack Obama and for he and Michelle to be the reincarnation of the former leader, Ruth Norman of the Unarians. However, God’s Master Plan is often in the details and it’s clear that the media frenzy over Michelle’s perfect outfits are part of the Distraction of “The Plan” because when she makes a fashion mis-step, her true identity is revealed, as Ruth was notoriously well-known as a Fashionista.

You be the Judge.  It’s all so damn Foxy.

Ruth Norman/Michelle Obama: The Same

Ruth Norman/Michelle Obama: The Same

Michelle's Fashion Misstep Immediately Identifies her as Alien Wife

Michelle's Fashion Misstep Immediately Identifies her as Alien Wife

 

 



up-coco_rosie_1_lg

My angel told me not to fear
Love is free and everywhere
Listen to that special part
It will save us, it’s the heart

God has a voice, he speaks through me
God has a voice, she speaks through me

Crystal light in every creature
Crystal light in every creature
Everyone has love to give

***

The Alien’s Daily smile today was as wide as my bathtub sea, stretching to infinity. Make my eyes shine wide to give some room on God’s little dance floor to the Coco Rosie  sisters, Bianca Leilani “Coco” and Sierra Rose “Rosie” Casady.  

The singing sister girls finally tour the US, beginning in NYC on September 2nd. Where Bjork only began is where these girls begin. I will definitely try to invade their auras when they come, for I had a master shopping list for when I came to just visit the Earth for a few hundred years which included:          

I instead by mistake, as you well know, ended up in the body of one Chelsea Nicole.  

YOU!…Coco Rosie!  You will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper named Chelsea Nicole… smile-a-wave-the-freak-flag-high-as-you-strip-it-proudly-off-your-body-smile.

(here are 3 pretty vids to make your day)

 

God has a Voice and She Speaks To Me!  I so love my girls!

TOUR SCHEDULE

2-Sep New York, NY Highline Ballroom
3-Sep Washington, DC Black Cat
5-Sep Boston, MA Paradise
6-Sep Quebec, PQ Le Circle
7-Sep Montreal, PQ Le National
9-Sep Toronto, ONT Lee’s Palace
10-Sep Detroit, MI Crofoot
11-Sep Chicago, IL Logan Square Auditorium
15-Sep Seattle, WA King’s Cat
16-Sep Vancouver, BC Red Room
17-Sep Portland, OR Alladin
19-Sep Yosemite, CA Symbiosis
21-Sep Los Angeles, CA Henry Fonda Theatre


China Tracy, What Are You Doing Here?  

Cao Fei

Cao Fei

cao_fei shoes

China Tracy you are Beloved by The Alien!  Like Smilin’ Iti (Me), China Tracy pops up everywhere and in Second Life she is the Second skin of artist Cao Fei.  The Alien was Smiling Huge over her a Sunday feast of her art, having seen too much art from China with mixed feelings. CF is thankfully the right probing mix beyond “cute” dredged up iconographic repeats of Western art in an angst filled stew sprinkled with symbols of China.  Just saying it makes my four stomachs queasy.

In RMB City, she has built a Luc Besson plus plus worthy utopian city playing with identity and community. Here is her day to night lullaby to her city and another snappy lil youtube piece here.

cao fei second skin

cao fei city

What are you doing here? is her series allowing factory workers full reign of their fantasties, ideas, hopes and dreams.  Companies such as Siemens Art Program and OSRAM China Lighting Ltd. in China let their workers become everything from a ballerina with the wings of an angel amid a manufacturing room’s work benches to a group of young men playing electric guitars in a vast hall.  

The Alien sees herself in this pose and dress in the Ikea warehouse after eating the Swedish “ish” meatballs.

what_are_you_doing_here_2_dscf0017_458

YOU!…China Tracy!  Cao Fei!  Whomever You May Be! will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper named Chelsea Nicole… smile a second, third and twelve thousand and tenth skin-boundary busting smile.

See this video on art 21 blog.

Cao Fei is represented by Lombard Freid Projects in New York.

Business as Usual at the Henry Art Gallery in Seattle until October 4th, 2009

Dress Codes: The Third ICP Triennial of Photography and Video International Center of Photography in New York from October 2, 2009 to January 17, 2010;

Her project in Second Life, RMB City, is on view and online 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.


“Being beautiful can never hurt, but you have to have more. You have to sparkle, you have to be fun, you have to make your brain work if you have one.”
Sophia Loren

sophia's house

Throw that intelligence curve ball indeed, Sophia!

…while my tiny Alien mitts await my rice flour to rise for my mini-bread baking experiment today, I salute all things home-y, bake-y, vintage clebritini-ish and womanly beautiful…the curvaciousness that is Sophia Loren for no other reason than she popped into my Alien world twice today and made me Alien smile.

First, my compound Alien eyes could not stop drinking in this image of Sophia in bed, very pleasing in a real Mama Madonna way. Note the painting of Sophia Madonna over her head.  She really worked it to escape poverty and miscarriages to earn her lush Mamahood to her two boys.  And then today, suddenly synchronistically and eerily, a friend said to watch her whole story on a videotape of the Charlie Rose show from 2002, where Sophia touts her history and her cookbook.

Sophia…are you tryin to tell The Alien something?

Of course, I check the Google news for some Sophia wisdom. That’s what her name means, scholars! Sure enough, in the news is Annie Hall actress, Diane Keaton, on a roll to save the Century Plaza Hotel from the wrecking ball.  Designed by Minoru Yamasaki of the Twin Tower fame, Diane and others are calling it a perfect example of 1960′s architecture.  Diane paid homage to a classic example of 1960′s icon-status architecture by saying that the hotel’s distinctive curving facade made it appear like “a sexy woman surrounded by ogling men – Sophia Loren in the 1960s”.

LA's Century Plaza Hotel

LA's Century Plaza Hotel

The Alien hopes Diane (scholars: The Huntress) is more successful in her fight than New York City’s tragic loss of the curvy, sparkly Lollipop building at Columbus Circle…replaced by a bland building with all the emotion and excitement of a circuit board.

Lollipop building

Lollipop building

Neither of these 60′s buildings have anything on my favorite, Oscar Niemeyer’s architectural curve-balls.

Osacr Niemeyer, Alien space travel building

Osacr Niemeyer, Alien space travel building

So Kudo’s to Mama Sophia for beautifully appreciating, turning and working life’s curve balls into Sparkly Magnificence vs. acquiesing to the wrecking balls. 

On September 20, Sophia Loren is 75 years stunning. Building and Rising again this Fall, Sophia stars as the Mama in Nine, the Musical movie with stellar co-stars, Daniel Day-LewisNicole KidmanPenelope CruzMarion CotillardKate HudsonStacy “Fergie” Ferguson, Look at Daniel Day Lewis and his hot Mama here:

 

Sophia Loren and Daniel Day Lewis

Sophia Loren and Daniel Day Lewis

YOU!…Sophia!…and Oscar! will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper named Chelsea Nicole… smile a curvy architectonique smile.


JeffKoons_Popeye_emailInflatable Monday.

Around here…(Coney Island parts) Monday mornings must be blown up and infused with fresh air, new sea legs and spinach-fed muscle! (coffee too…)

Iti’s Daily Love Smile today comes from artist Jeff Koon’s inflatable sea creatures which happily puncture and swim through heavy metal trash cans, ladders and meat hooks in London’s Serpentine Gallery until September 13th.  

Popeye was invented during the last Depression, a feisty hero whose challenges were nothing in the face of a can-do attitude, huge respect for wimmin and babies and a “I yam what I yam!” 

“Thas’ all I can stands, ’cause I can’t stands no more!”  

Koons, who financed his wildly successful art rise via his Wall Street brokering and re-financed his life after a float with a porn star mama,Ilona Staller (La Cicciolina)  and his child, knows a bit about re-invention, re-appropriation or a Pop Art and Pop Eye seeing applied to life.  In his interview with Anthony Haden-Guest he proffers this spinach advice:

I always think back, how did I end up in the position that I have? A lot of my friends and the people I have been around from the time of art school or living in New York as a young artist, we’d talk over a beer about the ideas and the work. But slowly it seemed that though some people would say how much they want to participate, they actually would create excuses when an opportunity was presented. And I realized that I would always accept the opportunity. And I think at the end of the day that’s why some artists end up where they do. They want to be engaged and to be involved, to take risks.

Jeff Koons inflates banality with regality. Like his idol, Dali, for Koons, the Persistence of Memory and Hope and Play is never that far away. Mix up some high and low morality, grab the spinach and your coffee…inflate your seeing and seize the day!

YOU!…Jeff Koons!…will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper named Chelsea Nicole… smile.

img-mg---jeff-koons-10_193947338710

Jeff Koons: 
Popeye Series
2 July – 
13 September 2009

The Serpentine Gallery

Kensington Gardens
London W2 3XA
T 020 7402 6075
F 020 7402 4103
Recorded information 020 7298 1515
information@serpentinegallery.org


La Second Chakra Sexy Prize to Allan Jenkins Orgasmic Organics

radish1 allan Jenkins

Always a lover of round, scented earthy fecund-ness in all its forms, The Alien wants to make a Celebritini from her latest discovery, English gardener and blogger, Allan Jenkins.

LES MUSTS! EARTH FLUSHNESS! CELEBRITINI + ZUCCHINI BABY BUMPS!

The most sexy garden pics EVER!  Take 5 minutes for an English garden escapist traipse… Blogger for The Observer‘s Organic Alllottment in the The Guardian UK, Allan ends his garden romps of hyper-lush close-up shots, wet Wellies and vine to plate fresh recipes with his own version of the simple, dronning English version of Tim Gunn’s “Make it work” finale with…

“But what is growing well for you right now?” or “What’s working well and what’s not?” or “Happy Salad Days!”

Isn’t it a lovely mid-summer metaphor for all the worlds you Earthlings passionately dream and grow?

YOU!…Allan Jenkins!…will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper named Chelsea Nicole… smile.


The Alien’s Monthly PMS where she rants on Celebs Rockin’ Their Chakras.

80s-man-in-the-mirror2 The Alien has been baffled and pouting in her designer vibrating light spacesuit this past month and now has finally seen the light on this day, The Solar Eclipse of July 21. All last month….she stared into the blue mirror glow of the computer screen, galactically bored to reincarnation by the entertainment world in June.

The death of a star, The Man in The Mirror, pushed all other juicy superfluous celeb news off the map this June moon…did you notice? The Alien can’t even find her mocking tone for the insipid, badly dressed or chakra-knockin’ celebritis among the icons of the day.

Death doth bring forth the pious and positive.

…and I guess that means I don’t get to mock Perez Hilton for his bedside morality tear-jerker, gossip jaws-a-poppin confession, (wish it were streaming with white angry squiggles) aka “My Statement” video of last month. 

…nor raise my thin n’ edgy Alien eyebrows over cheatin’ Gosselin’s gay girlfriend knoodlin’ premiere to their Hardy and Wholesome, Nuff’ respect, puff, puff, Respect-the-Moms of the World friendly line of kiddie-wear?

…wait…not even congratulate Susan Boyle for her sex-change?…her Vegas Golden Girl future headlining more White Tiger magic than Siegfried and Roy? susan-boyle-1985-785486

How is an Alien stuck in the body of a high all the time stripper aka me, Iti, supposed to satisfy her addiction for veinly disguised ancient universal wisdom proffered through cheap gossipy talk?      

answer: Find the Soul in my Spacesuit.

here goes…

CELEBS ROCKIN THEIR CHAKRAS

If you are new to this chakra game:  You ask…What is a “Chakra”? and what it mean?…rockin’ a chakra?)  Go here to see what they wheely are, Google or Wiki it…)

Given the dearth of everything but MJ and Farrah, this June, and in honor of the new energy of this Solar Eclipse, shutting down an aspect of life no longer true for us…let The Alien clear your busy mind and invite in THE NEW GOOD!

This middle of the year eclipse is in Cancer, the sign ruled by the MOON, all about your feelings and your emotional programming, your sense of home, family and your sense of security.  Any wonder we are looking at Moonwalks by both MJ and Buzz Aldrin right now??  The influence of Cancer is coupled with the energy of Capricorn, the hardworking sign of personal authority and the Externalizer. This eclipse is the end of a cycle begun in 2001, so rejoice!   Forms and Ideas of your Past nonsensical and no longer helpful views of yourself will thankfully will END to be replaced with a new, shiny bright fearless and secure future.

The Alien takes a random look at some of her Earth icons, artists and the makeovers, mimicking, masquerades, moon-walking, media illusions, clowning, punking and mohawking celebritis engendered under this past June moon to perhaps inspire you to melt into that warm sun of possibility!          

More Golden Girls

      Diana-Ross-mt01

1059014379_osquiz-liz The Sheer Will and Power Third Chakra and True Love Fourth Heart Chakra Prize Chakra Prizes go to Diana Ross and Elizabeth Taylor  Be it knownst, the Alien does not actually have The Michael Jackson fever, I am just capitalizing on it. I know, it’s unexplicable, rude and anti-human but it’s crushingly true, I am not a fan. He was an adorable performing child that hit adolescence and then became annoying. (I admit that I was an annoying young punk Alien as well, by instead pogo’ing to Scraping Foetus off the Wheel in bars located in clubs in far-away planets from here, but that’s another Life)

Nonetheless, my affection for golden icons is unwavering and The Big Golden Heart-Love Chakra response to MJ’s passing via of two of his devoted gal pals, Elizabeth Taylor and Diana Ross, this month made my skin nodules undulate for their integrity and grace and honoring of true friendship.

The Big Voice Fifth Chakra Rockin’ to photographer Dina Goldstein

beautyandthebeast_01

On another fairy tale note….Moto Photo!  This one is entitled Beauty and The Beast from Dina’s series.  Careful readers will notice the similarity between this golden princess dress and the dress of Elizabeth making a wry commentary about The Beauty and The Beast and our fairy tale culture under which racism, self-loathing and idol worship produce some strange face-lift off-spring.  RIP NIP TUCK.  ouch.  Ya couldn’t just play Diana’s Love Child over and over again and be done with it?

Oh! the places where your icon-love mixed with self-hatred will take you!  The Alien begs the Earthlings to see your BIG PICTURE, all the possible emotional beauty, rare and precious that you can engender and invites you to play with it and own it!  This is true life-changing “plastic” surgery. demi moore mohawk

Couple Punk. Trouble Funk.

Oh come on now! With all possible things two sexy Earthlings can do together! Ashton Kutcher punk’d Demi in a Twitter pic “Celebriti Shocker” causing a buzz about the Reality of the shot and what exactly these two celebritis do in their spare time.  He also published shots of her from behind in her skivvies making one wonder what the punk point is…(I guess I am getting my knockin’ chakra fix in here anyway!)

What is this need to “shock” and get the masses riled up for emptiness?  Any different than slogan-filled war-mongering? dina goldstein 1

The Big Third Eye Wisdom Sixth Chakra Prize to Dina again

The Alien says question everything you see.  Words seduce, images mesmerize. A picture may be entirely fabricated by a government or by your own mind.  Can the G.I. Jane’s of the world make some sense of the duality, the conflict, the wars, the fighting?  

Here’s the recipe for The Alien’s idea of a Make-Over in a Minute.  Be a Warrior. Take the light of the solar eclipse, shine a light on the past paths and struggles of your families and icons, recognizing that we can give up the fight.  Take up only the ideas that set you free like a weapon and “strive forward building a whole new and a unique future secure in the knowledge that the war is over.” (from: Astrosymmetry blog)

That’s smart Nowness.

The Fame and Glory Seventh Chakra and The Star Power Eighth Chakra Prize to Buzz Aldrin

buzz aldrin moonwalk Michael Jackson’s moonwalk?  Do not even get me started!  Here is a moonwalk that The Alien cares to rant much more about.  The hottest post on cnn.com is the debate…was the Moon walk faked?  From the improbable shadows to a waving flag on a windless space rock, I can tell you absolutely from my moon-induced, moon-cycle, moon-programmed PMS ranting state that the Moon is just a floating emotional computer laptop for the Earth.  If a girl is parked on this Earth, she’s in The Program.  If Earthmen actually parked themselves on the Moon, what can they show for it?  Just asking. In fact, cnn.com asks how many people even remember the Moonwalk…not many.

Buzz Aldrin: The Rapper Astronaut’s new book, “Magnificent Desolation” has him traipsing the lunar surface and careening over the Earth with his battle with depression and alcoholism after his return because no one knew who he was.  Now with people questioning whether the moon walk ever happened what will he do? How can he see himself properly?  At least his book is out.

The Ninth Big Star, Beyond “Really…It’s All About Me” Chakra Prize to El Sole Mio,The Original Golden Girl

So close those cute, darling Earthling eyes and look inside at the glow.  Peaceful right?  No plastic surgery necessary, no white-out, no war, no pranks, no punks.  No Stuck in the Middle. New Moon, New Day Dawning.

Go Forth Kids…You Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’…

the sun


Shirin Aliabadi's Sexy in Tehran

A regal woman entered the far end of New York City’s Bryant Park with her lover. She had a black and white 1970′s printed volumnous top, leggings and high, high wedge turquoise shoes and her head swathed high, high, high in a turquoise scarf like a 1950′s icon going on a European road trip and a deliberate curve of bleach blond Marilyn hair across her heavy, sexy dark eye-lined eyes.  The Alien’s style needle was quivering.

Immediately drunk on the unexplainable, hovering between enjoying a wickedly smart, sexy girl updating a classic pin-up girl look…too London cool for NYC…or perhaps just a stroke of luck with a scarf given the gathering clouds before it rained? 

As the couple came to the East end of the Park for shelter from the storm clouds releasing, I saw that this girl was wearing a Moslem headscarf while working every dark-eyed, long-limbed, high-heeled, bottle blond sexy tool ever hotly-breathed.

It was HOT.

Shirin Aliabadi photographs this phenomenan.  Her “Girls in Cars” series shows the subversive culture of young Teheran girls ready to party and “Miss Hybrid” are Superstars from the Botox and rhinoplasty capital of the world.  See London’s recent Made in Iran exhibit for more.

While the Alien shudders in the space suit over all “Alien Abductions” of “Stamp-me White Seals of Approvals” (ps why she does not speak of MJ) there is something free and sexy and smart appropriating here especially as it gets documented through art, immediately capturing the EDGE.

YOU!…Shirin…will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper smile.

 

Shirin Aliabadi Hybrid Girl

Shirin Aliabadi Hybrid Girl


 

Pina Bausch flowers

Pina Bausch flowers

Pina Bausch Flower

Pina Bausch Flower

The Alien’s Daily Smile Today is in Appreciation for The Artist who gave nod most wisely to spectacle, humor, scale of emotions and symbol. No, it ain’t MJ…Pina Bausch has passed.  The Alien shared dinner with Pina in a small Brooklyn cafe after a BAM performance of Mazurca Fogo and toasted The Legend with the cast and champagne.  That light in that small wooden restaurant room is a Light Ship in the Alien’s life.  After all the hot latin orgasms, huge water slides and splashings, rock climbing and breathing with dancers on stage, how perfect this toast! Another icon for the Alien, Pedro Almodóvar, paid beautiful homage to Pina in Talk to Her.

YOU!…Pina Bausch…will forever make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper smile.  


 

Sophie Theallet

Sophie Theallet

This wee Goddess absorbing Fairie and Alien Secrets worked by the side of Gremlins Jean-Paul Gaultier and Azzedine Alaia (10 years!)  A lavender and meadowish French countryside did this little Sophia right and she now dresses Naomi Campbell, Stephanie Seymour, Rossi de Palma, Gretchen Mol, Veronica Webb…thus “Elle” is the Alien’s new favorite designer, Sophie Theallet. 

(Michelle Obama is a fan.)

The fact that Nina Hagen loves her too and did this petit dessin has sent the Alien wistfully back into her youth when UFO’s in her stomach fluttered upon the anticipation of one day savoring the Earth’s beautiful Legends, Flowers, Women, Woven Stories and Clothes taken by the Summer breeze. (so Wim Wender’s Wings of Desire…I Know!..)

YOU!……Sophie Theallet!…make an alien stuck in the body of a stripper smile.  

Nina Hagen

Nina Hagen

 




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